on life and love and everything else

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What I know now

You were a lot smaller then. The day I first held you in my arms. A tiny little bundle of blankets and humanity that made me feel things I never knew I was capable of. If I only knew then, what I know now. I can still remember the first time you opened your eyes and I stared into them wondering what you’d be like. Would you want to play catch in our big backyard? Would we watch the game…

A guy on a couch

I was sitting in the front seat of my 1982 Oldsmobile 98 regency, the day the world changed. I wasn’t the best of college students at that time, and I was trying to decide whether I wanted to grab McDonald’s breakfast and go home, or attend my next class which I believe was speech. For some reason I had KTIS (the local Christian station) on the radio (which I almost never do), and when I turned the engine over I…

Let there be strawberry jello…

My Grandma Steffen makes the best strawberry jello you’ll ever eat. Her name is Arlene, and if you promise not to tell, I’ll share half her secret with you. She makes it with extra love, and puts cool whip on the top. For years and years, my brother and I have been skipping the “real” part of holiday and birthday meals, and getting the jump on the rest of our family by going straight to the jello. If you’ve ever…

A few of my friends

They didn't even know I was watching. A few weeks ago I had the privilege of leading a two week mission trip with students and adults from five local churches. For many it was their first such trip, and for some the number was somewhere near 75. Each one had a unique story, a personal reason for wanting to come along. Some were interested in seeing a new part of the country. Others wanted to help those in need. A…

Why good enough isn’t good enough

Recently I’ve been bothered by a trend. I call it the trend of ‘good enough.’ You might have different names for it. Some call it settling, others disguise it as ‘we’ve always done it this way’, I’ve even seen awards given in the name of participation - all of these fall into ‘good enough.’ Good enough is the idea that even though something isn't working to it’s fullest potential, it’s still ‘good enough’ - and it drives me mad. Individuals…

Goodbyes and Bike Rides

I didn’t see it coming. I was on our couch cuddling with my son Tuesday morning when I got a call from my aunt, informing me that within the hour my grandfather had passed. Adrenaline took over, and within a few seconds I was talking to my mom and letting her know I was on my way into town to help. The rest of the day seemed like every other day I have spent in similar circumstances (of which there…

Wounded

There is a wound in our world. Perhaps more appropriately, a gash. A hole from which blood pours and pain radiates. It reveals to reality all that is inside of us, and it isn't always pretty. Over the past few years in America, the wound has been growing larger. They do that when you irritate them. Pick at them, brush them against something, catch the scab and rip it off - it doesn't matter how - when you don’t leave…